Sing to Paul Anka's "Diana"

 

I'm so old and you're so young,
NOT like that song Paul Anka sung.
My Dad made me marry you,
I never was in love, it's true.
You and I will never be
a happy Royal family,
Oh, please stay away from me, Diana.
   
I'm no Henry The Eighth you know,
But Diana you have to go.
You may say that the standard is double,
but Diana you're nothing but trouble.
Royal wives have lost their heads
when they took lovers to their beds.
Oh, please stay away from me, Diana.

 

Camilla is my only lover,
there will never be another.
You have given me a reason
to send you to The Tower for bloody treason.
   
To be the mistress of a King
is an accepted Royal thing,
but for England's future Queen
to have a lover, is quite obscene.
You and I will never see
eye to eye on fidelity.
Oh please, stay away from me, Diana.

 

I never was much in the mood
to make love to someone obsessed with food.
The food comes up after it goes in,
that's how you manage to stay so thin.
But the Americans love you the way you are,
you look just like a movie star. 
Please, stay, in the U.S.A. Diana!

 

(c) Copyright  Victoria R. Crosby 1994 All rights reserved